Our newest employees or should we call them family?

The kids and I went on a mini adventure yesterday. We drove about 180 miles to see a small goat dairy which was part of a much larger operation that included all kinds of cute animals. Me I forgot my camera. Of course. The girls loved it! I did too, it gave me a little appreciation for what I'm trying to do here. Though my farm is different in many ways not to mention just a tiny portion of what they're farming it still adds a couple of details to that dream in my head. You know some of those things you cant really see until you see it and then you can add it to your own vision. Like milking stands. Ha! No one really thinks of milking stands right until you see them in action. And that we did.

Not exactly alpaca cute but the kids are already in love with her and her roomie. Yep had to get two. Even if they didnt need a buddy to keep them company I think we would have got two anyways. Both of these girls are due in April. Kid pics.

Can you say fuzzy? I got a batch of easter egg chicks to appeal to the customers and their kids. The kids and I have really enjoyed finding the green eggs so I think they'll be a real treat for just about anyone. All I need now is some ham and I call my self sam and ride a train. ;)




For those of you who can appreciate the sound of a rooster crowing in the morning. This is my favorite one. I think I'm going to spare him the hatchet.

Oh and the kicker. I had the luxury of a spider crawling down the back of my jeans while I was hauling a feed bin around. Joy! I'd take a pic but I don't think it'd be appropriate or I'd have to charge you by the peek. ;)

Today I'm frustrated and can't seem to shake it...

Last night, the first time in almost 5yrs I questioned whether I'm really happy here and with what I'm doing. Part of it is because I let some dude get to me, I let my mom get to me and my brother, I'm letting a lot of things get to me and it's all compiling into this giant chaotic mess all around me.

Part of it is just being tired I think, tired of bullsh*t from others, tired of all the bombshells that get dropped on my lap, tired of linger thought of what's going to go wrong next when things are going smoothly. I know think positive. Negative thinking leads to negative crapola. It's not like I spend the majority of my life thinking negative thoughts so obviously negative crapola is caused by something else other then my thoughts. Cause normally my thoughts revolve around a little fantasy of my little farm and my little family and our little existance here on this little earth. Normally. It's the negative crapola that causes me to start thinking negatively. Of course it's easy for a bystander to say well if you'd just think positive thoughts then postitive things would happen, of course they only say that when they catch you thinking negative thoughts cause when you're actually thinking positive thoughts then they could actually care less. Ya know the feeling?

So the dude that got to me. I'm too confident to need a relationship. I obviously have it all put together and could not possibly have any sort of want in a relationship. Therefore he's just not going to bother. Yea, I know it's a load of bs. The reality is I'm not quite up to par on his beautiful scale.

My mom got to me. Because now I make too much for state health insurance my kids have been dropped off of it. That's a two sided coin. Luckily the baby's back problem is being addressed at a hospital that is free for patients. I really got lucky there. God bless you God. If that's even possible. The down side is the normal check ups and what not will be up to me to foot the bill. Which isn't all bad because the kids only have normal check ups now that they're older. The kicker that's going to hurt is if the baby has to have her heart surgery. Okay, so back to mom getting to me. She says I should give up my plan of making the farm successful because it's selfish of me not to put my kids first. Yes, she actually said that. I'm being selfish for wanting to provide a home and comfortable lifestyle for my kids because I don't want to be on welfare and getting state aide. Why I let her get to me still, after all these years of knowing she has no ability to rationalize is beyond me.

My brother got to me. According to him I should find a suggar daddy. The definition of that: I should whore myself out in order to be able to pay him a full time check. Ha! I love my family! Just a whole boat load of funnies there. Yea, I don't know what I'd do without them.

I was told once that men want to save a woman. Since I'm not looking for a hero just a partner in crime I'm not in the right place in life to find love. Somewhere in there the definition of love is something like, must need to be saved. Or so it seems from what I've been gathering.

I'm a weakling. Maybe I'm addicted to dating (i'm joking). I joined eHarmony. Again. I figured, it was a way to meet people serious about finding a loving longterm relationship. So I subscribed for 3 months.

Heck I gotta have some sort of entertaining for the masses. Right? I'm determined to be the newest sitcom.

Anyways so today I'm frustrated. I'll get over it. Probably just the time of the month. Duck and cover! I probably shouldn't be so blunt. Hmm...

Oh and the conclusion. Of course I'm happy here. It's about the best way I can raise my kids. What could be better?

I can't seem find the spell checker on this updated blog post thingy so forgive my misspellings..

This n' that...

Elizabeth is in love with dresses. As I've mentioned before she's half girlie. I actually think she gets it from her momma. As much as I hate to admit it some days I'm part girlie too.

Girlie I guess isn't such a bad thing. Sometimes it comes in handy but other times it tends to get in the way. Like when I take the lawn tractor in for repairs or take a flat tire to be fixed men talk to me like I'm a girl! The nerve of them. (I'm half joking)

Remember those chicks I got way back when. The ones I was 'suppose to keep you updated on but due to my lack of habit of blogging I neglected to do so... Well here they are. Big and beautiful. Though the black ones are a little intimidating, the 5 of them will perch up on the porch rail like big black buzzards waiting for something to die. Or at least in our imaginations that's what we believe they are doing. They're mimics. (again half joking)

I love the big yellow roosters. I think they look the most "farmish" of all the roosters. Don't ask me why. Maybe it's because they're the most filled out. Or maybe I just think they're the least intimidating. Or maybe it's because they would look the best on my dinning room table. (If I ever find someplace else for my seedlings)

And my lovely hens. Thanks to a wonderful hatchery I got to discover the coolness of green eggs. I doubt I would have ordered "easter egg" layers otherwise. But they really are neat.

One of the best choices I've made so far was letting my oldest have this puppy for Christmas '08. She's one smart puppy. Her name is MP (Michelle's Puppy) While I applaud her smartness you can see by the picture that she's still worthy of a mess. :) And looking awful guilty!

This is how most of the evenings are looking now days when I come back in from working. The picture doesn't do the sunset justice but it's certainly a way to kiss another day goodbye. Have I mentioned how much I love the view from my little hillside? I love it!

Today's happenings... well part of today...

Check out my pumpkins. I started them 2 weeks ago.


These are Giant Pumpkins, I'm going to plant these along my front yard which is up a hill but seen from a major truck route. After they're grown I'll carve them on the spot. Wish me luck!

If I haven't told you yet, I don't have a green thumb, but I have good soil and loads of alpaca manure which seems to make green stuff explode from the ground with great humpf. Lucky me. In the heart of all things organic I'm using organic potting soil to start my seeds. It was only $.68 more per bag then the other kind. Lucky me.

Today I took a bold step. I put an ad on craigslist looking for a handyman willing to trade a little work for some home cooked goodness. No not a date. Just a little extra help. I'm THIS close to financial serenity. Which means a little ease of mind. You all know how that is. Not like I don't have enough to keep me up at night. So yea, wish me luck.

Social Networking...

I took the myspace plunge yesterday. Awhile back it was facebook. Now just to get everything in sync and connected. The joys of being online. Though I can't really put it down since this is where I get all my customers. I hope all this social networking is worth it. But I guess most everyone is on one site or another which means I should put in some sort of effort to us the same to keep them up to date on farm happenings. Cheaper then getting a website. Though I have one of those too. I just need to get it all set up and really on the run also. Maybe I'll start making online happenings my Sunday chore. I hate working on Sunday but it's about the only day I sit down for any real length of time.

Musings of a wandering mind...