Wednesday, July 14, 2010

i don't know what to do...

I went to pick up Ash today with a dread that I'd be giving the vet all of my money for the next month or two. Well it's worse than that. The vet won't let me bring my dog home without payment in full or some sort of collateral. This month I will learn how to live without the $350 I got from the renter plus the little bit I got from child support. It looks like this month I get to learn how to live with the horrible thought of my dog being locked up in a kennel until I can pay his bill. I didn't even think that was possible. They can't keep your kid at the doctors until you pay the bill. Sure it might hurt your credit if you don't get it paid but you get them back. How long will they keep him locked up? The bill is as much as the rent I'm lacking this month. How is it even right that they keep someones dog just because they're too poor to pay the bill all at once? It's just not right. They might as well tell all poor people that they can't have a dog because once it gets hurt they'll lose it. 10yrs companionship with my dog and because I'm down on my luck this month more than most I can't have him back. 

That can't be legal can it? I mean I know it's just a dog but he's be in my life longer than my kid. 

I just feel like quitting. I work so hard to give my girls safety and comfort. I work harder than I have to just to stay home and be their mom. But when it comes down to something like this, it just makes me want to quit. Forget the back breaking work and the sleepless nights. Forget the stress of not knowing how the year is going to end and when I can buy my kids their next pair of shoes or keep them in jeans cause they keep growing out of em. One accident and it boils down to I don't have money so I can't have an ounce of sympathy from a veterinarian. I'll lose my dog, because I don't have the cash to hand over or the bank account to run into the whole or the credit card to max out. 

If you're poor you better not have pets cause no one gives a damn when they're hurt. They just care about the money. That's what I was basically told today. It's all about the money. It doesn't matter how hard you work or how much you care or anything... 

What's the point in trying if you can't even get something as small and meaningless as your dog back when he gets hurt just because you don't have money? He's not worth anything to anybody but me and my kids. What's the point of trying so hard when it boils down to meaning nothing if you don't have money in the bank? Or a credit card to max out or something of value to pawn off? Nobody cares that you try your hardest, they only care about money. They're going to leave a single mom missing her dog because she doesn't have the money to pay his bill right now. 

It's just not right. 

I feel so stupid for crying so much but it's my dog. I mean how can someone be so mean? 

i don't know what to do...

1 comment:

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